Pretty in Pink, Pt. 2

I finally recovered from our recent painting marathon and finished painting the bookcase so we could move it out of the entryway (where we have to squeeze past it to get to the front door) and into Britt's room.

She requested a rainbow but Mikey didn't want me to get too gaudy with it, so I painted the front edges of the shelves to match her closet doors, and she was delighted with the results:



We moved it into her room last night and she rounded up all her books to put on the shelves. She was so excited about it that I'm beginning to feel glimmerings of hope that the books might actually stay there instead of being scattered all over the living room floor, but time will tell.

She also picked out which stuffed animals she wanted on the top shelf, but I'm fixin' to go yank the ugly red gorilla and the green teddy bear because they clash with my color scheme.

I'm going to paint a few flowers and butterflies or bees or something on the sides and tried to get started on that today but couldn't print out the template I want to use because the printer's out of ink. So I taped a sheet of paper to the computer screen and traced it. Then I dug the projector out of the garage and discovered that my template is too big for the projector window. Also, I can't get the damned picture to focus because the projector's electrical cord is too short.

So, no painting today. It'll have to wait until I can get to the getting place for some ink and an extension cord. Actually, it will have to wait until Tuesday when Britt's back in school; she's been very disappointed that all the painting happens when she's not here, because she wants to help.

(***shudder***)

Potty Trained!

The summer session at Britt's preschool started last week and she wore panties all three days with no accidents.

She only wears Pull-Ups at night now and, quite honestly, she wakes up dry most days so we could probably do without them, but I'm not in a big hurry to get rid of them altogether. I'm too busy leaping about with joy because I don't have to clean up poop-smeared booty anymore.

The Haircut

That whole first week after it was done, I could hardly look at her without wanting to cry. It's taken me this long to even be able to talk about it.

It was way past time to do something; combing the snarls and tangles out of her hair every day led to flailing, wailing and buckets of tears. And it was pretty hard on her, too.

I didn't cut her hair myself because I was afraid of screwing it up. So we went to a salon. Where it was butchered even worse than I could have managed. When we got home I was so wrecked that I needed to lay down with a cold rag on my head.

I'm finally getting used to it, a little. I trimmed up the bangs some and it needs a few more snips on the sides, but I can't get her to hold still long enough. We stocked up on barrettes and we've been experimenting to see what works best -- parted in the middle, parted on the side, bangs down, bangs pinned back, etc.

But you know what?



She's still the cutest kid on the planet.

Just ducky, pt. 2

Britt was eager for our baby duckies to "patch" but, when it finally happened, she slept through the whole thing. Which was probably just as well, since there was a bit of trauma involved.

We checked on the mama duck Sunday night and saw a little baby peeking out from underneath her, so we went away and let them do their thing for a while. In the meantime, I looked online to see what to expect next, and learned that she would probably lead her babies to the pond early the next morning.

We went out to check again a couple of hours later and saw her standing on the other side of the sidewalk with her babies gathered around her:



I told Mikey that I didn't think she was supposed to take them to the pond until morning, just as he leaned over to peek into the abandoned nest.

Guess what he saw in the nest?

Go ahead, guess.

You'll never guess.

It was a damned possum! Mikey chunked a rock at it and it ran off, but there was also a lone baby duck still in the nest that didn't look at all right. Not knowing what else to do, we went back in the house to give the mama duck a chance to take care of things:



When we came back out a little later, all the ducks were gone, except for the one still in the nest, which was dead. So Mikey took off down the street toward the pond to see if they made it there safely. He did find them on their way to the pond, and we've been meaning to go over there all week to see how they're doing (it rained like a mofo later that night and got pretty chilly), but haven't managed to yet.

We think she left here with seven live ducklings. When I was making the dead one go away I found a couple of unhatched eggs in the nest; I broke them open and saw that they were unfertilized. Which was good, because I was afraid she'd been chased off her nest before she could get them all hatched.

Anyway, Britt was extremely disappointed that she had missed everything, and also because she had wanted to ask the mama duckie if she could keep one of her babies for a pet, an issue that I am very happy to have avoided.

No turning back now

The mullet is no more.



Her poppa is going to shit.

We have poop, people!

In the potty! Where it belongs!

It was one week ago today that Britt finally started dropping the kids off at the pool. She wears panties all day and Pull-Ups only at night and away from home. She has occasional wet "accinents" but I haven't had to clean up any poopy panties, for which I am profoundly grateful.

She doesn't want an audience, though, so she slips away quietly to do her business and then comes running to tell me, "I pooped! Come and see!" So I go and admire the, um, end product, wipe her bottom and flush. And we all go away happy.

I put all her panties in her brand-new chest of drawers so she can grab a fresh pair whenever she needs to, and that's working out pretty well -- except that she usually uses a leg hole for a waistband, resulting in some pretty comical wedgies.

Also, I put all her stained, ratty clothing in the other drawers so she can pick out her own play clothes for the day and dress herself, while all her nice outfits for school and public outings hang safely in the closet. Or that was the plan, anyway. She keeps yanking them off their hangers, thinking she's going to wear her pretty dresses out to play in the backyard. Also, she changes clothes at least three or four times a day. Because she can. Because they're there. So accessible. So irresistible.

Another item in her chest of drawers: I was putting laundry away and pushed a drawer shut and heard a "yowwwr!" Stupid cat. I had to keep opening and closing drawers (more "yowwwrs") before I finally found him and dragged him out. I'm not sure if Britt tucked him away in there or if he found his own way in, but nothing would surprise me at this point.

Ruh-roh

Don't tell Mikey, but Britt announced this afternoon that she doesn't like her new room. She wants a Spongebob room instead.

She is, however, sleeping in it right this minute.

In other news, Britt dropped a huge load in the potty this afternoon. She needed to go, she went, and then she came and told me about it. I went, looked, flushed, did the happy dance, and changed her skidmarked panties since she hasn't really grasped the concept of wiping yet. Then she announced that she was ready to go to the park, which was her promised reward for pooping in the potty.

Poppa was so happy when he came home from work that they immediately headed out to the park. Except they didn't go anywhere. I came in here to enjoy a few precious minutes of free time, and I could hear them talking outside the window. WTF?

It turns out, our front yard is turning into a danged aviary. We still have the nesting duck, and now there was a baby mockingbird on the sockywock (that's BrittSpeak for "sidewalk"):



Of course, Britt totally wanted to pick it up and cuddle it but was firmly ordered not to touch.






Anyway, her trip to the park was delayed until almost dark, but she did get to go so hopefully that reinforcement will encourage her to do it again tomorrow. And the next day, and the next...

Except that she wet her pants twice while she was gawking over the bird, until I finally put a Pull-Up back on her.

(***sigh***)

Pretty in Pink

We've been planning to switch the office back to the bigger bedroom, so Mikey can keep all his guitars and amps and stuff in there too, and fix up the smaller bedroom really special for Britt. So that maybe Britt will actually sleep in there. So that Mikey and I can have our marital bed back.

Ahem.

Anyway, Bob took advantage of the three-day weekend to take Britt to Wichita for a visit. What better time for bedroom-switching and redecorating? I mean, can you imagine painting a room with a rambunctious three-year-old underfoot? I can, and it makes me shudder.

So, we got busy. First, furniture shopping! Unfortunately, Mikey didn't get home from work on Saturday until 6:30 so, after a nice dinner at Trapper's, we were only able to hit the two biggest furniture stores before closing time. And neither had anything good. The next day, after a nice lunch (it really was a holiday for me; no cooking all weekend!), we had to go to four more furniture stores to find what we wanted. I had no idea it would be that hard to find good-quality kids' furniture. Really, the selection was pitiful just about everywhere we went.

With a much lighter wallet, we hit Target next and found bedding, curtains and a lamp, and then we were off to buy paint. Mikey wanted pink, I wanted anything but pink. I lost. Then we went home and got busy. By this time, it was late Sunday evening, and Britt was due back Monday afternoon.

First, we had to clear the computer, books, videos and everything else out of the room. Fortunately (not so much for her) Bridgie dropped by, so we put her to work and the three of us managed that pretty quickly. And then, time to paint!



Mikey gave the ceiling a fresh coat of white and then me and Bridgie started on the walls. We could still see white through the pink, though, so I had to do a second coat. By myself, since Bridgie crapped out on us. Gah, it was only 3AM! What a lightweight!



Certain members of my family would call this Titty Pink. I call it Strawberry Shake. This is Titty Pink:



Okay, I may still be a little loopy. You know, fumes and all.

Mikey floored me with his suggestion to paint the woodwork white, which is something he wouldn't even consider in any other room we've decorated. Not the closet doors, though. He thought that would be too much white. So, what to do?



Hmmm...



The little shithead at the paint counter neglected to mention primer. It sure would have helped.



Because it took many coats to fully cover the wood. And each coat had to fully dry before the next was applied. I was up all night. Mikey slipped off to bed about 6:30 AM, and when he got up around 10:00, I still wasn't done.



Same with the back of the door. Many, many coats.



Eventually, the door will have Britt's handprints sprinkled across it in assorted colors. Not today, though. We're kind of painted out. Imagine that.



The switchplate was a lucky find. It was the last one in stock.



We were close to being done, but didn't manage to get the furniture in by the time Bob and Britt got back. Which was okay because Bob got to help lug stuff around and put it together instead of me.

(My old bookcase will sit against the wall on the right, as soon as Mikey finishes painting it.)



Then we hung the curtains.



And, once everything was as put together as it was going to get that day, we turned Britt loose.



And she loves it! She actually slept in her new bed last night. Until a thunderstorm woke her up and she came and crawled in bed with us.

We still need some little touch-ups on the trim, a new light fixture, and some cute knobs for the closet doors. Also, I'm supposed to paint a few flowers and butterflies randomly around the walls. But I think we did a pretty good job, considering that it was less than 24 hours from buying all the stuff to the "reveal."

What do you think?

Which witch?

This costume was in a batch of Kayla's old clothes that Sarah's parents passed along to us:



The color-coordinated cowboy boots really make the outfit, don't you think?

Hey, Britt, what are you?
I'm a weech!

Just ducky

Can you see her?



No? Can you see her now?



We have a duck nesting right outside our front door. Britt, of course, is absolutely entranced.



She's always wanting to go outside to see the duckie.

(Can you tell she put her own shoes on?)



All. Day. Long.

(That orange thing on the porch is her bubble barbecue. She stuck a popsicle stick in the fan and burned out the motor.)



So we go out once in the morning so she can feed the duck a piece of bread. We go out once in the afternoon to make sure she's still there. The rest of the day I fend off demands to go out and see the duckie. All. Day. Long.

The duck is apparently sitting on some eggs, since she doesn't get up and run away. Duck eggs take a month to hatch. I looked it up.

It's gonna be a very long month for me.

It's a girl!

According to the sonogram this morning, Britt's gonna have a little sister.

You'll never guess when.

Go ahead, guess!

You'll never guess.

Why, September, of course! It's practically required for any child or grandchild of mine.

It's a happy Mother's Day

We aren't breakfast-eaters, so breakfast in bed isn't something I would expect. But Mikey did bring me a nice lunch from Applebee's. Also, he washed a sinkful of dishes for me.

Britt brought me a rose from one of my own rosebushes. Sweet little Pooh.

Bridgie brought me a card and a balloon. She said the balloon was actually for Britt, to keep her out of my hair for a while. It worked, until Britt snuck her balloon outside. She came running to tell me, "My beyoon fyew away! I need a hewwicopter to get it! Hurry! Let's go get one!"

I'm still waiting to hear from my son, who forgot my birthday. Out of sight, out of mind, I guess.

Anyway, Mikey and Britt are off to round up gifts and visit his mother and grandmother, so I'm having a peaceful afternoon. I've already called my mom, and sent her flowers earlier in the week, so I plan on spending the rest of the day doing as little as possible.

LATER: Well, my plan didn't work out. Mikey and Britt brought me cards and candy and not flowers but five Variegated Euonymus bushes to plant in front of the house. Which is cool, except that we spent the evening digging holes and planting them. But now I plan to spend the rest of the day doing as little as possible.

And Bob still hasn't called.

EVEN LATER: He finally called. So, yeah, I had a pretty happy Mother's Day. I hope you all did, too (where applicable).

Out of the mouth of the babe

Some people call it a seesaw, some call it a teeter-totter. Britt splits the difference and calls it a "see-sotter."

The mockingbird that hangs around our front yard is a "birdpecker."

Whenever Mikey or I head toward the potty, she'll call after us, "Have a good accinent!"

My sewing machine is a "smoke machine."

Britt can hear kids playing in the yard behind ours and she's desperate to go play with them. Yesterday she came in and told me, "I can't get on the fence. I need a idea... Like this (holding up the ladder on a Matchbox fire truck). A ladder!"

She tells me I'm "prettiful."

She says she's a bird, so she can't use the regular bathtub anymore; she needs a birdbath to take her bath in.

We pass the neighborhood park going to and from school, and Britt gets very upset if she sees anyone else there. She'll roll down the window and yell at them, "Hey, you're in my park! Get outta my park, now! Get out!"

Also, she yells at other cars on the road. "Get out of the way!" "Hey, watch it, ya big skunk!"

When she does something she thinks is helpful, she'll say, "I'm a good job!"

She sure is.

Something fishy

When I first got my aquarium over seven years ago, I had nothing else to do. The kids had moved out, I wasn't working, and it was just me and Kitty hanging out together all day, so I had plenty of time to take care of my fishies.

Things are different now. I have Britt, and she's a full-time job.

I don't have the time or the energy or the interest to keep up with the aquarium anymore, so I've been letting time do its thing. I haven't bought any new fish in years and the old ones have died off one by one. My last rainbowfish died a couple of months ago, the last of the original batch from when I first set up the tank, so I guess she was pretty elderly. I was down to just one cherry barb and, when that one finally kicked it, I was going to shut the whole thing down and be done with it.

And then Mikey decided that fish were just the most fascinating thing on earth, so he and Britt went to the fish store and came home with a whole tankful of rainbowfish, gouramis, neon tetras, guppies, plecostomuses (plecostomi?), more cherry barbs and a few other kinds.

Now he hangs out at various aquarium shops around town and he'll call and ask, "Can I have a German blue ram?" or "Can I have some discus?" and I have to tell him why they don't fit in with our current setup. Also, he and Britt have been studying pictures of fish on the internet. So now he wants a saltwater tank and a cichlid tank, plus a tall corner tank in the living room for some angelfish. He wants me to set up our old 10-gallon tank again so we can move the guppies and neons to it and make room for more fish in the 55-gallon tank.

Oh, and the best part? I get to do all the water changes and assorted maintenance because I'm "the one who knows how."

He has totally lost his mind. And he's driving me out of mine.

Wrapping up March

Finally got some new batteries for my camera so I could upload all the pictures I've taken over the past month. Sucker eats batteries like they were Tic-Tacs.

Anyway, did I happen to mention that Sarah brought her new baby over? Well, she did, so Britt met her little half-brother for the first time:



She loves babies; several of her classmates have baby brothers or sisters and she's always asking if Poppa will bring her one. We're kind of, "Um, well, that's being taken care of, you know, from other quarters."



Also, Easter! Britt's finally big enough to hold her own against the bigger cousins, and she did pretty well in the egg-hunt race:







And then there was some sort of ball game:



I'm not sure what the rules were, or if there even were any.



But she had a good time anyway.



Next up, Mikey's turned into a fish fanatic. God help us all.

Defeated, again

This week was spring break at Britt's preschool, so I thought it would be the perfect time to address the issue of potty-training once again.

We went the bare-butt route again, with pull-ups only for bedtime or leaving the house. And she managed to confound me over and over again, by doing her business before I got her pants off in the morning or after I had her dressed for bed. Our sitting-on-the-toilet sessions resulted only in heart-broken sobs and rivers of tears.

Finally, she announced to me, "Pee and poop in the potty is stupid! Bad potty! Bad, bad potty!"

We have gotten exactly nowhere this week.

Excuse me while I go bang my head against a wall.

It's raining

This morning Britt stood in the bay window in the kitchen, looking out at our sodden backyard as she sang, "Rain, rain, go away..."

When I walked into the kitchen, she turned around and cried, "It's not working!"

K is for Kangaroo

We went to Britt's class at the zoo today and learned about kangaroos. At craft time, Britt successfully pasted a pouch onto a kangaroo cutout, and slipped the little joey inside it. She was doing great until the girl sitting next to her ripped one of her kangaroo's arms so her dad told her she'd have to rip the other arm to match. So Britt followed the other's kid's dad's instructions and ripped the arms off her own kangaroo.

(***sigh***)



Anyway, the kangaroos are at the very furthest corner of the zoo, so we wandered off to do our own thing instead of following the rest of the class down there. Britt wanted to ride the tram, but it would've cost $3 for me and $2 for her and I only had a ten on me and that was our lunch money, so we watched the ducks and geese for awhile and then we walked in a different direction than we normally do and found -- Holy cow! -- a humongous playground! How long has that been there?

Britt got to swing



and slide



and climb



and walk across crazy rubbery thingys



and climb ladders



and ponder the universe. Or something. I dunno what she was doing here.



And then we got lunch and went home, because that was enough excitement for one day.

More excitement tomorrow: Britt's scheduled to meet her baby brother for the first time ever.

(Not) All Thumbs

I was looking at Britt's Easter pictures, trying to decide which ones to order, when I noticed her thumb looking freakishly, enormously huge. Like, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues huge.



But her thumbs are not huge! They are perfectly normal, very cute little thumbs. See?



That's the same thumb. Totally normal. And you can sorta see the other thumb here:



It's completely normal, too.

So, I dunno what happened. Some kind of optical illusion, I guess.

An early Easter treat

Got the proofs of Britt's Easter pictures already, but they're not as good as her regular school pictures were. Her hair looks like crap, but I really worked on it that morning so I don't know what happened.



I felt sorry for the poor bunny, being manhandled by all those kids all day long.



This is Britt's patented for-the-camera grin:



And she's got the Sarah lip here, so this one's definitely not my favorite:



There were two more, but they're worse than these. It's kind of a relief, though, because we won't be spending as much money as we did on the last set. And that's good, because they're already hitting us up for registration fees and first month's tuition for the summer and fall sessions.